I think part of real maturity is developing the ability to determine the difference between a need and a want, something that most people I know, myself included, seem to have quite a bit of trouble with. Beyond the mind numbing econ discussion of the distinction, I think there is something more, something more subtle, something more significant.
Needs can be real, but real maturity comes in the form of not mistaking wants for needs. At least I think. The distinction is something I need to understand, if I want to not insist my wants on other by justifying them as needs. If that makes any sense.
The problem is that something stated as a need insists upon itself, carries within itself an implied ultimatum, this need must be met because it is necessary, or else. A need is inherently selfish, a way of imposing one's will on others, on the world.
But most "needs" are not truly necessary, they are just desired. So they are really wants. The trick is to learn that a want, not yet fulfilled, is not a disappointment, just a desire, a chance to long for something yet to come. And longing, the promise of things to come, has a flavor all its own, and is not that bad after all. Hunger is, I've heard it said, the best spice. So I'm happy to learn to want instead of need.
